bits of me rearrange like
a cubist painting 


swishing
of a gravel seabed
swirling round my head 


grasping the jetty I try to
save from drowning as
the salty water fills 
my mouth


I just keep
scratching him 
hoping the pleasure 
will stop waves of nausea 
melting my knees and avalanche
of cells like pebbles looking for a floor